All I Need . . .

Your starting point for all things satirically tasty and buzz worthy.

Features

Shut The Fuck Up Apple Cheddar Pie

March 1, 2018

This Awesome Totally Awesome recipe comes from Chef Vanessa Rosenspies formerly the head Pastry Chef at Model Milk one of Canada’s most celebrated restaurants in Calgary, Alberta, Canada.

UnSpotified: We Revisit De La Soul's Unstreamed Masterpiece, Buhloone Mindstate

June 11, 2018

This group doesn’t talk about how financially solvent they are. They talk about being late on their rent. They talk about letting their parents down and missing them. They talk about letting their friends down. They talk about not judging others who have made different choices. And when Dave says, “I’m the greatest MC in the world,” it’s ironic, it’s self-deprecating.

ATA Reviews and Revisits Gorillaz' Self Titled Debut

November 24, 2018

I felt there was so much to this band I could follow. They were dark, edgy, but fun to watch. And, as a fan of them since their inception, I have never been disappointed in them.

Uber Chronicles

Brian Kruse is like no one you’ve ever met. He is a learned, sardonic, articulate professor who knows more about music, politics, writing, philosophy, whatever…than you. He is also blind and takes a lot of Uber rides. These are his stories–raw and uncensored.

Pride Day Morning

July 6, 2018/by Brian Kruse

Had a Bad Day…

March 10, 2018/by Brian Kruse

Uber Chronicles: Adventure With Deborah

January 8, 2018/by Brian Kruse

Uber Chronicles: Talking So Well

January 8, 2018/by Brian Kruse

Uber Chronicles: Jesus Rides Beside Me

Awesome Lampoon

LMFAO

Local Couple Held Captive for Friend’s Unprovoked Acoustic Concert

November 21, 2018

Local man Colin Butler and his wife Cynthia report having just experienced a thirty-minute performance by area musician Jacob Jeffries.

Angry Socialist Kindergarten Teacher Ruins Thanksgiving for Fifteen Local Families

November 21, 2018

A grassroots organization of concerned parents of students at the Zinn Uplift Progressive Elementary School warns of dangerous trends from a socialist classroom teacher.

St Louis-Area Woman Declared Punk Rock Nurse of the Year by Suburban Hospital

March 28, 2018

St Louis resident Jayme Stabb, also known as Jaime Siedrech, was honored with the Most Punk Rock Nurse Award by the staff of St Cornelius Hospital in Cotteville, Missouri.

Awesome Totally Awesome - Parents with Fortnite Playing Flossing Teen

Parents Around the World are Refusing to Hangout With Their Fortnite Flossing Adolescents

December 20, 2018

In a strange turn of events, parents around the globe are devising any excuse to avoid hanging out (or even be seen) with their Fortnite flossing kids.

Steez

You Know My Steez.

Shia LeBeouf is Not a Normcore Fashion God; Rather, His Style is Influenced by Basic Betches

1 Comment

April 26, 2018

Kicks We Like: Nike Lunar Force 1 Duckboot Low

February 12, 2018

I grew up dealing with sub-zero winters in Canada, so when it comes to outdoor gear, I’m down with whatever keeps me the warmest. If I had money in my pocket to spend, my first choices would be Timberland and North Face.

Mother Clips Tags From Son’s Off White Jordans and Subsequently Ruins His Life

July 23, 2018

“It started off well enough,” he lamented. “I mean it actually started off great. On Monday, my birthday, I woke up to a deadstock pair of Off White Jordans from my mom and dad. I thought it was a dream, you know.”

My Love/Hate Relationship With #Supreme - Photoshoot with @ymanibarbee @adore.eu and Essay

2 Comments

January 31, 2018

Like it or not, Supreme will always be the litmus for streetwear. For old streetwear heads like me, there continues to be a love / hate relationship with Supreme. About a year ago, I was driving home from work and one of the neighbor kids (usually dressed head to toe in Pac Sun or even worse, Dallas Cowboys gear), cruised by me, riding a Razor scooter, with a mohawk helmet, wearing a Supreme box logo hoodie. I lost concentration and almost drove my car into the kids playing basketball in the driveway a few houses up.

Gaming

Fallout 4 Addict Arrested After Breaking Into A Local Man’s Basement Survival Shelter

February 28, 2018

Fallout 4 addict, Michael Hunt was arrested this morning for several counts of burglary after breaking into a local man’s (survivalist Red Knect) basement survival shelter.

Awesome Totally Awesome - Castlevania Photo:@zerobriantees

Netflix Castlevania Season 2 Review: Pulls You in By The Neck and Doesn't Let Go

November 9, 2018

As soon as I heard Adi Shankar was creating an animated series based on the beloved Castlevania franchise, I was tuned in and ready to go.

PLAYAAA!69 Proclaims That He Will Never Stop Playing Hanzo

January 8, 2018

Despite constant bullying, Hanzo Main, I.P. Knightley (who plays as PLAYAAA!69), proclaims that he will never stop playing Hanzo, and feels the even when his entire team has already picked their character and there is no healer and no tank on the team, that he must pick Hanzo.

It’s Time to Stop, Blizzard!

August 5, 2018

Awesome Totally Awesome - Spiderman Easter Egg

Love and the Spiderman Easter Egg

October 19, 2018

One instance of what most would assume to be a harmless easter egg turned tragic. This is the story of Tyler Schultz.

Gaming Mods

November 9, 2018

Video games and mods have gone hand and hand since conception. Players have always wanted to find backdoors and spread their own creativity into the games they love so much.

A Fortnite Love Story

July 6, 2018

Todd stands in front of his hotel’s bathroom mirror. He’s sweating profusely as he bonds his fake, blonde goatee onto his chin. This, doubled with his blonde, platinum-dyed hair makes him look completely different. He takes a deep breath as he begins...

Nerding Out: Jump Force-Which Character Would Win in a Fight

November 8, 2018

Awaiting the release of Jump Force, a fighting game one can only hope and pray will become competitive, I thought it would be fun to review the announced character list.

Middle Aged Man Levels Up To Platinum In Overwatch And No One In His Family Or Peer Group Seems to Care

February 28, 2018

After nearly eight months of grinding it out in Overwatch, (a Blizzard competitive shooter game), Johnny Blaze, a middle aged, laid-off, former sales executive (and Junkrat main) finally leveled up to Platinum.