All I Need . . .

Your starting point for all things satirically tasty and buzz worthy.

Features

Kamikaze Fallout: Who Took the Biggest L from Eminem

September 26, 2018

The hip-hop community has been torn to shreds by its great white shark, Eminem, these past few weeks with the release of his newest album titled Kamikaze.

Piece of Mind: Iron Maiden's Metal Masterpiece

August 16, 2018

With the success of 1982's Number of the Beast, one would think Iron Maiden would be hard pressed to follow it with an equal or better record, but they did just that with Piece of Mind.

Awesome Totally Awesome - How Much Do Rappers Make?

Calling Out The Flex: How Much Do Rappers Really Make

November 9, 2018

Chance the Rapper called out that if we could see the bank accounts of a lot of rappers these days, the numbers would be way lower than we’d expect.

One of the most significant albums of the 1980s, Jane's Addiction's seminal Nothing's Shocking, almost didn't get recorded. While the album turned out to be so influential to alternative music and the beginnings of grunge, the band that went into LA's Eldorado Studio to record it nearly broke up during production.

Fallout Gamers Already Planning Sick Days, Family Emergencies, Vacation Time, and Any Excuse to Work Remotely in Anticipation of Fallout 76 Release this November

June 11, 2018

Eileen, a luck 10 has plans to “Just wing it and miss three weeks of work. I’ll cross my fingers and toes and hope I have a job whenever, I decide to return.”

Uber Chronicles

Brian Kruse is like no one you’ve ever met. He is a learned, sardonic, articulate professor who knows more about music, politics, writing, philosophy, whatever…than you. He is also blind and takes a lot of Uber rides. These are his stories–raw and uncensored.

Pride Day Morning

July 6, 2018/by Brian Kruse

Had a Bad Day…

March 10, 2018/by Brian Kruse

Uber Chronicles: Adventure With Deborah

January 8, 2018/by Brian Kruse

Uber Chronicles: Tuesday Morning Microagression

January 8, 2018/by Brian Kruse

Uber Chronicles: Talking So Well

Awesome Lampoon

LMFAO

Fallout 4 Addict Arrested After Breaking Into A Local Man’s Basement Survival Shelter

February 28, 2018

Fallout 4 addict, Michael Hunt was arrested this morning for several counts of burglary after breaking into a local man’s (survivalist Red Knect) basement survival shelter.

Six-Year-Old Disappointed Yet Again by Hipster Uncle’s Gift of Vinyl Records

February 12, 2018

Six-year-old Lindsey Morris was disappointed again this year after receiving a Birthday gift of record albums from her hipster uncle, Connor Butler.

Supreme to Offer Budget Line of Products

2 Comments

March 1, 2018

For those of you who cannot afford Supreme gear at retail, let alone aftermarket pricing, Supreme will soon be offering a budget line called Supreme Market, featuring items conveniently priced below $40.00.

Your Grandpa is Copping Supreme x Lacoste in Velour

April 19, 2018

Edward Murphy, a former Beverly Hills Cop turned barber plans on copping the velour bucket hat, track suit, and polo shirt in peach. When shown pictures of the track suit ensemble from Supreme’s online site, Murphy responded “What is that velvet? It’s beautiful.”

Steez

You Know My Steez.

Lil Yachty Has No Idea What A Public Enemy Is, But Plans On Copping All Of The Supreme X Undercover Public Enemy Collection Releasing This Thursday

1 Comment

March 13, 2018

Despite, having no clue who Public Enemy (“PE”) is and having never heard PE’s classic, Fear of a Black Planet, Lil Yachty (“Yachty”), is eager to cop each and every piece of Supreme X UNDERCOVER’S Public Enemy collection.

Baggage Handlers Preparing to Destroy Your New Supreme X Rimowa Luggage

1 Comment

April 11, 2018

Upon the announcement that Supreme will be dropping its highly anticipated Supreme x Rimowa aluminum luggage collection, baggage handlers around the world began honing their sledgehammers and practicing their elbow drops in anticipation of completely annihilating each and every piece of this collection that makes its way into their possession.

ATA Review of AGENDA, Long Beach

July 19, 2018

Inclusiveness: It’s what AGENDA is all about, and what makes it a special kind of tradeshow. No matter who you are, you can stand side by side with companies like the Hundreds, 10 Deep, or Chinatown Market and compete with the same. That’s the draw.

Brands We Like. Bifocal Media: The Kings of Punk Rock T-Shirts

August 5, 2018

Our objective from the start was to create t-shirts for people who might not typically wear band shirts. I’d like to think we produce high quality, unique, collaborative shirts with a cool backstory. Limiting production to small numbers assures that you’re not going to see 10 other people wearing the same shirt.

Gaming

Assassin's Greed: Did Ubisoft Intentionally Make Assassin's Creed Odyssey So Difficult That You Have to Buy Your Way To Completion

November 9, 2018

Whether you're slashing through hordes of enemies with a sword or gunning down waves of mutated zombies with a machine gun, it's all part of the grind.

Awesome Totally Awesome Overwatch Worst Players

Top 5 Terrible Players in Overwatch

August 13, 2018

However, there’s always going to be those who pay no mind to what is needed to achieve victory but rather prioritize their own fulfillment of self-gratification. As done to death as this topic may be, here is my list of the top five worst players in Overwatch (in no particular order).

Whitehouse Chief Strategist Resigns Over Trump's Cosplay Obsession With Overwatch's D.va

February 28, 2018

In a shocking development, a newly released memo from President Trump’s twenty-fifth White House Chief Strategist revealed his intentions for resignation, stemming from an incident involving the President’s obsession with the massively popular video game, “Overwatch.”

Gaming Mods

November 9, 2018

Video games and mods have gone hand and hand since conception. Players have always wanted to find backdoors and spread their own creativity into the games they love so much.

Nerding Out: Jump Force-Which Character Would Win in a Fight

November 8, 2018

Awaiting the release of Jump Force, a fighting game one can only hope and pray will become competitive, I thought it would be fun to review the announced character list.

Middle Aged Man Levels Up To Platinum In Overwatch And No One In His Family Or Peer Group Seems to Care

February 28, 2018

After nearly eight months of grinding it out in Overwatch, (a Blizzard competitive shooter game), Johnny Blaze, a middle aged, laid-off, former sales executive (and Junkrat main) finally leveled up to Platinum.

Old School Gamer Disappointed by New School Additions to Call Of Duty: World War II

February 12, 2018

Walter Fullmore, 38, of Manitowoc, WI, an avid Call of Duty fan, was ecstatic to hear about the game returning to its roots in World War II. Turns out for Fullmore, he would find himself in a place he did not recognize. The multiplayer.

Awesome Totally Awesome - Castlevania Photo:@zerobriantees

Netflix Castlevania Season 2 Review: Pulls You in By The Neck and Doesn't Let Go

November 9, 2018

As soon as I heard Adi Shankar was creating an animated series based on the beloved Castlevania franchise, I was tuned in and ready to go.

PLAYAAA!69 Proclaims That He Will Never Stop Playing Hanzo

January 8, 2018

Despite constant bullying, Hanzo Main, I.P. Knightley (who plays as PLAYAAA!69), proclaims that he will never stop playing Hanzo, and feels the even when his entire team has already picked their character and there is no healer and no tank on the team, that he must pick Hanzo.