Fiction

WELL I’LL TELL YOU STU, I DID BATTLE SOME HUMONGOUS WAVES.

BUT YOU KNOW, JUST LIKE I TOLD THE GUY ON ABC,

“DANGER IS MY BUSINESS.” – JEFF SPICOLI

Wu-Tang Clan and Activision to Collaborate for Call of Duty, 36 Chambers Edition

March 1, 2018

Videogame giant Activision announced that it will be collaborating with the legendary hip hop conglomerate, the Wu Tang Clan (“Wu”) for several upcoming projects, including Call of Duty, 36 Chambers Edition.

Fucking Eh

February 1, 2018

I had just arrived in Paris after spending the past five weeks in Angola managing some offshore drilling rigs. Shitty job. After laying down the rules, I got some pushback from the locals. Not a surprise. Typical work politics down there.

SOMETHING PROFOUND

1 Comment

January 11, 2018

It's the reason why people sit through funerals, attend weddings, wait expectantly outside delivery rooms—that unnamable presence that accompanies death and birth and the consummation of love. They're all hoping for a glimpse at the infinite. They're all looking for something profound.

Awesome Totally Awesome - Freaks & Weirdos Boutique

ACCEPTANCE: FREAKS AND WEIRDO'S BOUTIQUE

September 14, 2018

Come to the Freaks & Weirdos Boutique at the corner of Route 2 and Willowbrook. Acceptance is just one strange trip away

The Mark

July 6, 2018

Mark’s eyes widen, and he gets out of bed, opens the closet, then pulls down on the coat hanger in the back. The clothing rack drops into the floor and the back wall of the closet opens.

Wu-Tang Clan and Activision to Collaborate for Call of Duty, 36 Chambers Edition

March 1, 2018

How Maria Beat The Real Housewives of the PTA at Their Own Game

August 5, 2018

I really didn’t care about winning, but seeing this lady’s cheerleader determination, made me say “I’m winning this mofo.”

Awesome Totally Awesome - Todd does Lyft

Todd Gets a Job With Lyft

June 19, 2018

Todd sits in his car, anxiously tapping his fingers on his steering wheel in a rhythmic pattern as he waits for his passenger. He looks at his lit LYFT mustache on his dashboard, humming silently. “Okay, okay,” Todd thinks to himself, “let’s not screw this up.”

Tinder Tales

February 12, 2018

Todd sits nervously in his chair, reading the Italian menu sitting in his sweaty palms. He’s berating himself internally for choosing this place, he doesn’t know how to read or speak Italian.

Awesome Totally Awesome - Pee Smelling Murderer

How I Became a Pee Smelling Murderer With a Job Offer From an Aspiring Pimp

October 19, 2018

I had just graduated from college and was waiting for a life-changing job offer. In fact, any job offer would have been nice.

A Fortnite Love Story

July 6, 2018

Todd stands in front of his hotel’s bathroom mirror. He’s sweating profusely as he bonds his fake, blonde goatee onto his chin. This, doubled with his blonde, platinum-dyed hair makes him look completely different. He takes a deep breath as he begins...

ThE WooD BoX At 11 BRooKlYn RoAd

October 23, 2018

The house was of an unremarkable style, square and plain. It sat on a lot surrounded by tall woods...As Alison waited for someone to answer, she glanced at the wood box.

Fucking Eh

February 1, 2018

SOMETHING PROFOUND

1 Comment

January 11, 2018

Todd Sends a Dick Pic

June 7, 2018

Todd sits in the bathroom stall at work. He frantically combs his fingers through his hair and begins to pull at it. The beads of sweat pouring down from his forehead are only offset by his eyelids that are blinking a million times a second.

Awesome Dropping

Food and Sex: The Way to a Man's Heart (Duh)

November 9, 2018

Let's face it, the two things guys need to live are food and sex. To that end, our complex, yet feeble minds can be satisfied in a variety of ways involving both.

Alex Ovechkin: NHL’s True Golden Knight

June 15, 2018

After 13 seasons in the NHL that saw him win the Calder Trophy as the league’s best rookie, the Maurice Richard Trophy seven times, the Art Ross Trophy once as the league’s leading point scorer in 2007-08, the Hart Trophy thrice, Alex Ovechkin won the elusive Lord Stanley’s Cup (and Conn Smythe Trophy as league’s playoff MVP) this season against the Vegas Golden Knights.

Fear And Loathing In The Penthouse Poker Game

February 12, 2018

I finally got the call. A friend of mine, who runs several legitimate businesses, but tends to spend his off time in the shadows had told me about a private, big baller home game held weekly in the penthouse suite of a Los Angeles area, deluxe, high-rise apartment.

Fiction

Wu-Tang Clan and Activision to Collaborate for Call of Duty, 36 Chambers Edition

Fucking Eh

SOMETHING PROFOUND

ACCEPTANCE: FREAKS AND WEIRDO'S BOUTIQUE

The Mark

Wu-Tang Clan and Activision to Collaborate for Call of Duty, 36 Chambers Edition

How Maria Beat The Real Housewives of the PTA at Their Own Game

Todd Gets a Job With Lyft

Tinder Tales

How I Became a Pee Smelling Murderer With a Job Offer From an Aspiring Pimp

A Fortnite Love Story

ThE WooD BoX At 11 BRooKlYn RoAd

Fucking Eh

SOMETHING PROFOUND

Todd Sends a Dick Pic

Awesome Dropping

Food and Sex: The Way to a Man's Heart (Duh)

Alex Ovechkin: NHL’s True Golden Knight

Fear And Loathing In The Penthouse Poker Game

Awesome Features

ATA's Timeline Review of The Distillers at the Hollywood Palladium

Kamikaze Fallout: Who Took the Biggest L from Eminem

Maple Leafs Move With the Times in Hiring Wickenheiser The GOAT of Women's Hockey

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Parents Around the World are Refusing to Hangout With Their Fortnite Flossing Adolescents

Gotta Love Dom: The Underrated Rapper has Built a Cult Following Without Selling Out

Making "Killers": How Iron Maiden Got the "Maiden Sound"

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